What can men do? Avoid being a perpetrator or victim of rape!

Do not have sex unless you have verbal consent from your partner. How will it feel afterwards if your partner tells you s\he didn't want to have sex? It is never okay to force sex on anyone, for any reason!

If you are getting a double message from your partner, speak up and clarify. If you find yourself in a situation with a partner who is unsure about having sex or is saying "no," back off. Suggest talking about it.

Do not assume you both want the same degree of intimacy. Your partner might be interested in some sexual contact other than intercourse. There might be several kinds of sexual activity that you can mutually agree on.

Stay in touch with your sexual desires. Ask yourself if you are really hearing what your partner wants. Do not let your desires control your actions.

A partner who turns you down for sex is not necessarily rejecting you as a person. Not having sex or not "scoring" does not mean you are not a "real man." It is okay not to "score." Real men accept the responsibility to not harm another person.

Be aware that a man's size and physical appearance can be intimidating. Many victims report that the fear they felt based on the man's size and presence was the reason why they did not fight back or struggle.

Be aware of the effects of drugs and alcohol on decision-making. The fact that you were intoxicated is not a legal defense to rape. You are responsible for your actions, whether you are drunk or sober. Taking sexual advantage of a person who is mentally and physically incapable of giving consent is rape. If your partner has had too much to drink and has passed out, or is not in control, having sex is legally defined as rape.

Understand how your own attitudes and actions perpetuate sexism and violence, and work toward changing them. Examples: